I feel uncomfortable having my photo taken. I bet most of us do. We don’t know where to look or what to do–it’s vulnerable to be looked at so closely, with no control over how we are being seen. It’s uncomfortable to be seen. And if you, like me, have experienced the power of therapy and safety work, then you know just how healing, beautiful, and redemptive it can be to be fully seen.

This year, even more than past years, I made a point to take myself out of the “wedding photo” equation as much as possible. No direction. No expectations. Trying to have as little interference as possible, just to see what happens. walking around folks’ neighborhoods with them and taking photos as they talked to one another. Taking a step back and giving people space to experience their wedding day as it happens naturally. Simply watching things unfold, without telling people where to go or how to “be”. It didn’t happen every time, but there were some wedding days where I hardly spoke a word. Days without direction or posed photos or “sunset portraits”. Instead, I was given the challenging gift to relinquish control and expectations and to just observe. 

This is what stands out to me from 2019: people allowing themselves to be seen, despite the discomfort. Leaning in and trusting the process when it feels weird or performative.  Allowing me to be with them and see them in their bedrooms, their bathrooms, their pre-ceremony anxiety attacks, their heartfelt letters, their body insecurities, their family tensions, their expectations, their stress, their “this is silly, weddings are silly” spirals, their kitchens, their cars, their plans, their rituals, their tears, and their joys. I’ve been shown again and again and again the power and the beauty in taking a deep breath, letting go of control, and allowing yourself to be seen. It has empowered me to have the same courage in my own life. Both with myself (as I’ve returned to therapy this year), and in turn with the next person I photograph. The power in it reverberates.
It’s not easy, and not everyone is ready. But when it happens, it allows you to see and experience the tiny beautiful things that are happening all around us. Here are some that I was entrusted to see this year:

thank you thank you thank you thank you.
I feel so lucky that I get to see and capture these photos for people.

 

2020 marks ten years of photographing weddings for me. The people, the graciousness, the openness, the support, the encouraging emails, the forgiveness, the sounding boards, the referrals, the trust, and this right here–you, reading and looking– have made all of the difference for me the last ten years. so many people have entrusted me with their memories and I hope that I’ve served them well. I hope you see the common denominator in these photos, and that they make you feel connected to the people in them.

I couldn’t be more grateful and I’m excited to see what awaits in the next decade.

year’s past: 2018, 2017, 2016, 2015, 2014, 2013, 2012, 2011, 2010